Malaise

The Thanksgiving weekend promised to revitalize but all it did was leave us woozy with triptiphan.

When your major is based on papers it is always the paper due dates two weeks before finals you dread. The term paper you had high hopes for in early September has horrified you by the pandora's box of research it opened. It sits half-edited on your desktop as a proof of your inadiquaecies. That dream grad school seems to be getting further and furter away as the semester ends and the A's you were anticipating have turned into B's. Even the weather throws you off. The snowfall in October is forgotten. Jackets are optional in a 60 degree November. It's warm out, yet the sun falls below the horizon early and guilts you for not having done more with your day.

Malaise sets in.

Alcohol is a depresent, not a social enabler. You'd rather play video games, at least you can accoplish a goal. You forget dressing well. As much as you've tried to dress well, the sweat pants and hoodies win out. You used to go to the gym three times a week; you used to be toned. Work and stress claim victory and symbolize the extra sitting on your waist.

Everything extra is culminating too. There are appointments you forgot, the grant deadline looms, the six-hour test for some departmental award. You're calling in to work, cancelling your hours hoping you'll be productive with them. All the while you have to be worried about your schedule and work next semester.

Just a few more weeks, waiting till it ends.

The Next Generation

No I am not talking about Star Trek, what I am talking about is the next generation of videogame. Every five to six years or so a new generation as they call it comes out. Every so often an old competitor dies and a new one shows up (referencing the death of Sega and the rise of Microsoft). The problem I have is what constitutes a new generation? The answer at a glance would be next level in graphics. This would seem correct but not so if you look at what past generation systems have done in comparison to the PC. The last 3 to 4 generations have always come out to surpass the PC in graphics then it surpasses them for a little (it is a ritualistic cycle). This latest generation has not done that in the least bit nor will it ever (quote me if you like). What this generation has told us though is who the follower is and who is the innovator. I would like to point out that I was a die hard Sega Genesis and Play Station 1 and 2. This innovation is shown by interphase, the introduction of the thumb stick was a great leap forward done the Play station we have had the joy of the exact same controller for the last 11 years. Play Station market scheme lets use the same stuff and just make it look better. Sure they have added rumble and now the new tilt feature but it is still the same. Lets get something else out of the way I hated the game cube for the most part but the introduction of the wireless controller on a successful scale was truly genius. And of course the PS3 and the Xbox 360 can do but only copy this to this current generation way to be behind and call it new (asses).

I will tell you a secret, we are in 5^th generation on my scale. I define the next generation in video games by the interphase. The first generation is of course the arcade. Where else but the arcade did video games start? This generation is typified by the huge joystick with that red or orange ball on the top with the one fire button off to the side. The next is the PC with the keyboard and mouse. It has proved so versatile this gen. has survived the longest, still used to this day. Next is the console with the simple D pad and some action buttons. The fourth is the console with the thumb stick (still used and oh so important). Sadly to say the Ps3 and the Xbox 360 do not had enough innovation to constitute a new generation themselves.

This pains me more then you think. I love almost all the exclusive titles on the Play station line up. Xbox claims to have exclusives but once the PC tech catches up with the consoles; the games come out on PC (prove me wrong people). So what is the fifth and so far final generation? I hate to say it but it is the Wii. The Nintendo Corporation has once again made me feel bad for the choice in console company that I have made my flagship for so long. The ability to aim with my whole arm, to open doors with a flip of the wrist or to swing the master sword for the first time is more then worth the 250 bucks. The main complaint is “the graphics are not that good.” True, it does have less graphics but it plays like a dream and is fun as hell. You are telling me that if a game looks not top of the line but has great gameplay you will write it off? Are you telling me then that the system with the best specs will always win out? But note that the Nintendo DS beats the PSP in sale every month it has half the specs as the PSP. Also remember the Dreamcast, it was far superior but it failed as well. I will not say that the PS3 and the Xbox 360 are bad systems or not fun but please stop copying each other and come out with something new.

How do you write a research grant that might result in your institution looking bad?

Easy answer is you don't.

I'm applying for a grant awarded to undergrads; about ten are available. I would like to compare one of the university's academic programs to that of other institutions. I admit my inspiration comes from the many aspects of this program I don't like, and as I am an activist-within-the-system, I figure why not get my university to sponsor research to document everything wrong while flagging the highers up into the problems. Starting to get nervous because I'm rethinking the faculty sponsor I choose, but the faculty who are more appropriate to work with for the project are the same people contributing to the university’s problems. He's a fine sponsor and a smart individual; it's just he hasn't done the kind of field research I'm planning. It'll be ok; I'll just have to be fairly self-reliant on a lot of this, and since it's supposed to be extremely student-driven by principal of the grant program I shouldn't be relying on faculty to heavily.

I do not understand the power relationships in a university. I don’t know whether it’s realistic to expect being rejected because I didn’t choose to work with the faculty who would be the most appropriate. Though the program head is well-known to be a scathingly unsympathetic by all students who have had to deal with him, Athens suggests this scenario: I get the grant, and then am received with open arms because he knows I am critiquing his program.

The proposal is due in a week and I won't find out till March. So there will be little to update on. Athens's submitting one too, though on a completely unrelated topic. I'll be surprised if either of us gets denied and shocked if we both do.

The Creation

It's time to get serious about most things in life. School, career, and marriage are at the top of the list, but blogging is not far below. Xanga was the choice for a while, but I've grown weary. Myspace is for "deep" thirteen year olds and unempolyed twenty-somethings (not a stellar combo). Facebook has introduced the Notes feature, but since they started letting non-college students make profiles I fear it will go the same way as Myspace.

Blogspot is the choice for businesses, political comentartors (those in their basement and those with merit alike), and anyone looking for that dash of professionalism without paying for it.

And so I too will join the ranks of those attempting to be more polished than the other outlets allow. I cannot promise my finacial advice will be solid or my political news exclusive. I cannot promise my jokes will be funny or my prose will be poetic. I sit in the midwest in a public university, feeling as average as average gets, with nothing to write about but the Ill State of Affairs.